The First Day

I was going through old e-mails and found this. This e-mail was the from the first day N left to go down to the Keys for FEMA.

It feels like another lifetime. . . .

i have this thing. that although you probably don't care that much about what i did with my day - the small trials and tribulations such as filling out my self eval for work. or the rejoicing: succeeding in hiding behind the student in front of me as to not get called on by my professor and forced to answer questions that i don't know because i didn't do the assigned readings - i still feel it somehow imperative to tell you about it. cause i tell you everything. everyday. and it just feels right. nothing more. nothing less.

the self eval sucked. basically. if you want the long and the short of it. yes, i have taken on krista's responsibilities which on paper don't boil down to too much but when taken into a larger context that's a hell of a lot of additional work. who knew that krista called ahead to place orders for spoons, paper plates, etc. I personally though the employee showed up with the supplies and replenished them as needed. small particular like that don't fall into the 150 word space you're alotted. i can just imagine you know how i feel about that . . .

but i grinned and beared it. finished it. updated my resume in bdis. which did not look pretty mind you taking into context my job experience and those of my fellow (more elderly) co-workers. they're established. i'm still roaming. but i did it. got it done. handed it in. we'll see how the review goes. hopefully something better will come out of it rather than just the 2.75% raise i was told.

carrie met me for lunch to lift my spirits. it helped. a lot. i'm am so grateful for her friendship and her willingness to compromise sleep, etc to make me feel better.

yosse was on my heels all day asking if i needed anything - pop, etc. it was a nice gesture, but for the most part i just wanted to be left alone today. if anyone asked about you it was hard not to cry so i just did my best to avoid all contact with everyone.

i have a lot of homework for the weekend. a art history test next thursday so i'll need to work on my readings for that class this weekend. no matter how much i love you or how grateful i am to spend every second i can with you, i know this experience will be helpful to my grades. have nothing else to do, why not excel at school?

this morning after i dropped you off i accomplished a lot. dropped your dte bill in the mail. also dropped off your end of contract $. I looked for a drop box inside the door where you get your cookies. one of the employees saw me roaming around there at 6:30 in the morning and asked if he could help me. he probably thought i was some crazy woman off her medication :) but that's taken care of. went back to your apt and finished up the laundry. took my stuff home. made breakfast and went to work.

will try and go to apt this weekend and clean out the fridge and start packing up the kitchen. any thing you want left out for when you return?

oh, one more thing i turned off your computer this morning. hope that's ok.

if i don't talk to you tonight. have a good one. be safe. sweet dreams. i love you.
L